Tuesday, May 16, 2006
LIRR Commuter from Hell: Bluetooth Weed-whacker Guy
This is the first LCFH that (eventually, anyway) made everyone around him happy.
Here's the story: Early train in, usual crowd, quietly chatting or reading their NYT, WSJ, or paperback novels.
Bluetooth Guy has a new toy -- his wireless Bluetooth earpiece. So he's holding the phone at arms length (see photo below), and talking LOUDLY into his headset.
He is oblivious. Discussing the mundanities of life: the problem with the furnance, howsdawife n da gurls, and other middling inanities.
He is loud enough that people around him start to talk about how loud and rude he is -- openly, right in front of him. Oblivious man keeps on chattering, and his conversation is so accidentally ridiculous that people sitting nearby start tittering -- almost giggling at the absurdity of the situation.
One fellow commuter mocks a parallel loud phone call -- only without a phone!
How's it going?
Fine, and you?
On the train.
It was quite amusing, and everyone around starts laughing.
Then the oblivious Bluetooth Guy starts discussing his high pressure water cleaner, and people begin giggling a bit. Not very loud, but the situation has shifted from annoyance to bemused outrage.
Then, the coup d'grace: Bluetooth Guy starts talking about his Weed-whacker and then Angela, the woman sitting directly in front of him, begins to laugh -- long, hard and loud. Evreryone sitting nearby begins to laugh out loud also.
Everytime the guys says the word Weed-whacker, she cracks up harder. Soon we are all laughing nearly uncontrollably, and Bluetooth Weed-whacker Guy finally gets off the phone, as oblivious to the events around him as when the train pulled out of Roslyn in the first place.
We wipe the tears from our eyes. Best ride into the city in a long time . . .
Bluetooth Weed-whacker Guy
Angela sitting in front of the Bluetooth Weed-whacker Guy . . .
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