Top Ten Signs You Have A Bad Stockbroker

Friday, March 02, 2007 | 12:43 PM

Top Ten Signs You Have A Bad Stockbroker (via David Letterman)

10. When stocks go up, his pants go down 

9. He's unavailable whenever "General Hospital" is on 

8. Invested your entire portfolio in JetBlue 

7. Instead of Wall Street, he works at Wal-Mart 

6. He shaves his head and goes into rehab 

5. Hot stock tips, no -- nude photos of Alan Greenspan, yes 

4. Keeps using the word Ga-zillion 

3. No number 3 -- writer depressed after losing everything in stock market 

2. A few years back told Martha, "Sure it's legal"

1. Claims he once had a three-way with Morgan Stanley and Merrill Lynch

Thanks, Doug!

Friday, March 02, 2007 | 12:43 PM | Permalink | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0) add to | digg digg this! | technorati add to technorati | email email this post



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My stockbroker is a woman. It's time for gender neutrality!

Posted by: Katherine | Mar 2, 2007 1:34:37 PM

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