Fake Fed Statement Generator

Wednesday, October 31, 2007 | 01:30 PM

While we await the Fed statement, my friend Paul, who has been stuck somewhere in Canada, has created the "fake Fed Statement generator."

Its classic econo-geek work by someone who appears to have gotten stuck in one too many airports:


Fake Federal Reserve Release
Release Date: October 30, 2007

For immediate release

The Federal Open Market Committee decided to increase its target for the federal funds rate by 75 basis points to 5 1/2 percent.

The Committee is desperately afraid that a more accommodative than usual stance of monetary policy, coupled with screwy underlying growth in analyst salaries, is providing marvelous support to economic activity. However, the relaxation of balance of payments concerns has moderated gold prices, moderated earnings upgrades, and lowered, generally speaking, debt markets. These developments, along with the uncertain stance of monetary policy and ongoing whizzy change in the price of Nebraska real estate, should foster decreased economic stability over time.

Although the timing and extent of that decline remains uncertain, the Committee perceives that over the next five minutes or so the upside and downside risks to the attainment of sustainable growth are not balanced. The Committee believes that, taken together, the balance of risks to achieving its goals is weighted toward ass-kicking growth for the foreseeable future.


Click Fed Chairman Bernanke Ben to create another fake FOMC release!

Ben-in-a-Box Fed Statement Generator ®


Awesome! Thanks for the afternoon laugh, Paul.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007 | 01:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (13) | TrackBack (0)
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Posted by: Isaac | Oct 31, 2007 1:39:01 PM

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